I woke up rather sluggishly this morning after another sleepless night. I’m feeling down-in-the-dumps and that feeling has been skirting around my mental thoughts for the last few days. I do have pressing things on my mind, and I wonder if they in and of themselves are the reasons for my melancholy or the juice fast is creating a metabolic disruption that is imbalancing my brain chemistry.
I’m having a treatment with Gabriele Engstrom (she is an amazing naturopath and healer, as well as a fellow therapist and close friend) on Thursday to check me out before my operation. If there is any imbalances going on inside me, Gabriele will find them.
My lethargy had me dragging my feet all morning. I didn’t want to make juice. I didn’t want to be on this fast anymore. I wanted to cry and cry. I was feeling kinda low. I had some leftover watermelon-mint juice for breakfast and took a photo of me smiling sweetly for the pic. I certainly wasn’t feeling happy. I know I look tired, I feel it too.
After seeing a client, which perked me up, (doing the healing work I love always makes me feel better) I looked for a new juice recipe which would incorporate oranges and pineapple. I found one, except the juice is meant to be frozen. My mouth has big issues with cold foods and drinks, so I just drank it down. It was really nice. I added a teaspoon of flax oil to it, to help bind the toxins so they can be flushed out of my body more efficiently. Thanks for the tip Zoe. http://www.rebootwithjoe.com/pineapple-turmeric-popsicles/
I have noticed my memory has been getting fuzzy and slow over the last few days. Now, I know I’m going through menopause, and that causes massive forgetfulness, though this is different to the normal forgetfulness. It’s like the connections inside my brain are only linking up sometimes. I feel like I’m wading through a forest of wispy fibres. There’s part of the thought that’s clear and logical, and the other part of it is fuzzy, trying to connect up and barely only bridging the gap. Maybe I just need more sleep to clear out the fog.
I had some errands to run down at New Farm, then I came back home and processed a big jug of cabala juice. That’ll keep me going throughout the afternoon and evening. That fuzzy-head stayed with me all afternoon. I found I was double-checking when I crossed a street (more than usual) and consciously listening to myself to see if I was talking to myself out loud. Is this what it feels like when someone starts losing their marbles? It’s an awful feeling.
I’m having a camomile tea now to calm me and my mind down. I find when I think about an issue for a prolonged length of time, my breathing shortens and my heart starts to race. I knew my internal organs were (God…..what’s the word I’m looking for….brain went foggy again…..arghhhh) impaired, but whoa, this is way worse than I originally thought. I really need some major healing to bring me back to full strength. I guess that’s what happens when I’ve constantly given to others and neglected my own needs for a long time. I have a feeling this healing journey is going to be bigger and more intense than I originally imagined. Not only physically, but emotionally, mentally, spiritually and energetically as well. I feel too weak to say “bring it on” like Lleyton Hewitt used to do in his tennis hey-days, yet that is what I would like to convey.
Here’s to your good health…salud.